Not Stalking

Sitting in Panera, whiling away. Looking at old pictures, this one worth an artsy treatment. A few people here from past, but still present, experiences at church. I prayed deeply last Sunday. Went to Mass. Sought forgiveness and peace. The homily concerned itself with sloth. Yes, that's it... my most insidious sin. Can't remember exactly, but the priest described it as essentially spiritual despair. Yes, that's it. Despair at the condition of my life to the point of oblivion; carelessness. Seemingly beyond doing anything about it.

These people will not engage me. They will not walk over with any solicitation as to how I am. "I'm dying." If ever I offended you I'm sorry. They know I'm schizophrenic, yet still they stand off. Despair.

It's a long time since making any post here. Nowhere else to go.

Talk about old stuff, made a friend request of my ex-wife on Facebook. She's had no activity for years but presume, if the account is still active, she'll get a notification. No response. Despair is the norm. How I grieved in that experience. No progress, I admit.

Process

 

How I'd love to get up to Cottonwood. Or something. Have been thinking about going to Globe and on to Salt River Canyon but gas prices onerous. They're starting to come down. 

Funny experience finagling a discount at Circle K. They issue a card. 10 cent discount. Data base glomming. Complicated. Later for that too. 

Harmonic Ditz

Reached out to high school chums. Have I burnt the bridges too much?
Wafting in the digital clouds, I shared these with them. No response. Odd.

Be Nice

Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear. Ephesians 4:29

What a pretty picture. Arcosanti. Agua Fria. An arroyo.

The Shadow Knows

 
Whiling away. Complications. Pretty much resolved.

Persisting

 

Very alone. For some time. A few debacles. Laptop dishelvelment. Salvaged.

Get Fixed

 

While putting my boots on. Bit of a struggle. Socks moreso. But got it done and luckily had camera alongside. Papago Park. Merely a stroll a couple of weeks ago. Am ready for more but that's contingent on chiropractic visit tomorrow. First one presently; will get 'worked up' and, hopefully an adjustment on the road to resolving. Feels out of kilter, for sure. No pain. Tight. Fatigues quickly. Lumbar  and sacral plexus. No activity during COVID quarantine and close to home in easy chair 18 months. Back at it about two. Dropped near 50 pounds.

Feeling good. Yes, high hope for fixing, then another walk in a park. Made a point to lose as much of the gut as possible with hydrotherapy. Range of motion. Some little treadmill but uncomfortable. Sometimes, compensating and recovering balance, my gait is wobbly. Will get that straightened out directly!M

Meanwhile, good to post this and expect more pictures with increased activity.