Holding the Fort

Land of the free?

Home of the brave?

Well, we'll just see about that. But, frankly, I should not like to find out. The deterring power of the common law got to me earlier in a common sensical manner.

After seeing Chelsea Clinton's annoying comments about the country and the Donald the other day, I've been itching to make a comment on Twitter. I did so today; on her page. I made a disparaging remark of civil nature along the lines of con artistry after declaring that she was reprehensible.

Now, like many others, I've considered her off limits despite her family notoriety. But these were very public and seditious remarks. I let her have it. Balancing act.

After a while... did I libel her? Public person? Borderline and who needs the trouble. Not paranoia but felt my neck tighten and a surge go down my spine to the joints of my appendages. Trouble. I deleted the comment and blocked her. Not interested in any boring polemics with nobodies like her. 

Otherwise, Memorial Day passes peacefully.

Had a thought for my cousin Kenneth, KIA Vietnam in 1968. Getting late now. A story to tell some other time. These are his decorations.

Under God

Several days since posting. Most of the energy has gone into tweets. Quite a lot going on with regard the Russian collusion canard caper. One does tend to get caught up. 

I've tended to stay home much more than I ever have. Used to be I had to get out upon awakening, out for coffee and get online. Now that I do that from my easy chair I make my own coffee. But my calorie burning is much diminished.

Presently in chapel. The preacher speaking on John 5. Healing the paralytic. "Take up your mat and walk." At Bethesda pool in the Temple.  The Jews take exception (he has violated the Sabbath) and Jesus goes on to declare His mission in rebuttal.

"My Father is at His work, and I too am working." Oh, how they wanted to kill Him.

Above me, illumination. Verses 19-47 His apoththosis. I must leave off here and read it through. Through and through, thick and thin.

After Church Composition

Put on the full armor of God,  

so you will be able to stand firm  

against the schemes of the devil.     

                                            Ephesians 6:11

Quite a few changes in 50 years. Adolescence can be silly, no? How much I am become beyond "Don't go there." Liberty good; libertines problematic.

Presently in chapel. Believing Jesus. Earlier reminded He calls us, and calls us friends... if we obey His commands. Absolutely nothing to do with the Rolling Stones. How ridiculous life is.

Saw a PBS fund raising program recently, the geriatric Stones showcased. It was quite odd seeing how the audience was packed with much younger people, especially the women, in a phoney looking groove, singing along. Ridiculous. But I myself was hooked - as an adolecsent. Means nothing to me now. Just happenstance seeing that T-shirt.

Yes, rather the armor of God. Saw this book for sale at church last week. A 19th century tome. $30. Found it online for 99¢. So much to read. A friend at church gave me a book about Genesis and I've committed to read the pastor's lessons on the Old Testament. Oh, I see I've already mentioned that. Have to get to it.

The preacher is speaking of the wonder of Jesus. Who is He? To say, as the apostles did, "You are the Messiah; the Son of God." and mean it, experience it. The pastor says it's more than experience too. Believe it. Jesus is the source of life. Jesus is eternal life.

Frankly, I'm not doing too good, insofar a being good. Still smoking and eating stupidly. I whine that I'm bored. I'm lazy too. Please God, help me to get in line with what is plainly sensible. It's as if I should have this militaristic attitude... discipline. Work at it. Challenge myself. What a putz am I. Idleness indeed. The devil's got a good hold of me; but I know it and I know I'm wrong. God help me.

Time Hole

Just saw a young teen-aged kid walk by with one of these copyrighted T-shirts on, emblazoned per Rolling Stones. Bit of a chuckle. Bizarre to see it, on the face of it - pardon the pun, as sort of a temporal time landmark. What... fifty years ago? 

WHERE HAS THE TIME GONE?

16 I was. No money to buy records. But I seem to recall I did get "Begger's Banquet" and someone gave me "Sticky Fingers". The stuff still holds up. 

Ephemera

There was a crescent moon in the west,
along side a star but not as I looked in a
chart to ascertain. It was Venus. There...
then, not long after, both gone down under.

Heavy Reading?

Finally, be strong in the Lord and in the strength of His might. Put on the full armor of God, so that you will be able to stand firm against the schemes of the devil. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the powers, against the world forces of this darkness, against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places.

Therefore, take up the full armor of God, so that you will be able to resist in the evil day, and having done everything, to stand firm. Stand firm therefore, having girded your loins with truth, and having put on the breastplate of righteousness, and having shod your feet with the preparation of the Gospel of peace; in addition to all, taking up the shield of faith with which you will be able to extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. And take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.

                                                                                                           Ephesians 6:10-17

Need to memorize this. Focus. Downloaded this book. 19th Century apologetics. Exegesis? Have to look these up to be sure. The author is sure of himself in The Lord.

Apologetics:

1.) systematic argumentative discourse in defense (as of a doctrine)

2.) branch of theology devoted to defense of the divine origin and authority of Christianity

           Exegesis:

           an explanation or critical interpretation of a text

OK. Not heavy. It's a lot to peruse. Help me, Jesus.

Stay With Me, Jesus

In passing, the monumental facade of the Methodist Church at Central and Missouri, passed many, many times over the years. Odd thing is that yesterday, never having given much thought to Methodism other than the movement by John Wesley to preach the gospel to the underclasses as he thought the Church of England only served the privileged, I found out that they are Arminian. Hence I finally understand the adversity with Calvinist Baptists.

Lately, being briefed at Sovereign Grace Church and reading up on these sorts of things, I feel inundated with doctrinal differentiation, if indeed this is what you call it. I find the ministerial cohort to be quite adversarial, especially with regard to postmodern matters like Liberation Theology and extensions of storied Social Gospel in its assertions as confronted by fundamentalists.

I like my pastor very much and I'd like to get more friendly with some of the fellows at church. However, I do not wish to be too much adversarial. The old Catholic in me is prone to see the benefit of the vows of chastity, poverty and obedience in deferring to those much wiser than I. At the same time, my secular skepticism about religious mysteries much conditioned. I should like to be real. I should like to be really a disciple of Jesus. There's more to it than just reading, and so much to read it can be too much.

I would that my personal life gets healthier and I do more towards ministry. I was asked by the pastor to join in a meeting with a prospective member. That made me feel great. Unfortunately, he didn't show up. I recall a lot of pressure from other churches to 'witness' and invite people to church. I do so occasionally, tempered by the occasion. That would have been good experience for me, watching the pastor interact. Some other time.

Happy Chance

Totally relaxed in tub after churched day, sermons and lessons. Blessedly assured and I'm alright. God in His heaven, all's well with the world. The preachers have related much.

Three roses for you... whomever.

A touch of the blues. Not much.

Feral Interaction

Engaged in tweeting, ever am cognizent of the Pavlovian milieu. How our manners and education, our sensibility and savoir-faire, our need for recognition and validation, our tendency for aggression and wishing to win. One does not wish to 'go off, but it happens all thr time. Loyalty and territoriality.

Had a laugh think about how to fit in, as an outsider. There's a few groupthink themes to assorted tweets depending oon the avocation. There's journalists, theologics and artists. I like to think the venue another art form. Hence there'll be a range of expression. Just want be sensible and kind. 

It all brought me to read Psalm 119, which I have to do beyond the single citation I know... I've hidden Your word in my heart that I might not sin against You.

Dry, Very Dry

Had a good soak. Presently cooling off nicely on my front patio, the sky lightening in the east. If I weren't about ready to hit the sack I'd take off and get some shots. (Do I need to put a comma between conditional clause and action? Good question for later.) The atmosphere is exceptionally clear and the Prussian blue is commencing to brighten.

Have to stay out of fights. Really let McCain have it on Twitter. What he tried to pull off at church and then this sordid, shirty thing to do. Years ago, things were different. He was no help and he simply reminds me of all the shit I've had to put up with.

Bored Stiff

Don't get some of these bar and restaurants here. There's no business on account the demographics  being relatively dry and the menus are overpriced. So you'd think the staff would talk with their customers. Chat them up a bit. Surprising how stiff and snooty they are. Then they rush you through your meal then want to go home so slip you the check soon as your done. At 11 pm! At least that's what just happened with a waitress expecting a tip for dropping off a cheeseburger. Ha... stiff them and get a dirty look next time. 

Haven't been out in a while. At least not since last baseball season. (No football for me with those twerps.) Not since going to another place where I had the most vile cheeseburger I've ever had in my life. Should have called the health department. Real nasty people and the place was worse.

No, thanks, barkeep; never touch the stuff.

Should mind the budget as well. Oh well, this place is close to Winco so at least the trip is economical. They've got a great bulk food section. Get some dried fruit and some camp vittles.

Came to see DBacks. Dodgers. They lost. First time watching this year. Have felt out some people regarding camaraderie in this regard. Nothing doing. What a life! Complete waste of time and money. No friendliness at church either. In Bible study, merely competitors. Ugh. Hit the Winco and then the tub. Anothe day in the middle of nowhere.

Yeah. I'm ticked. $11 for a cheeseburger. 15 bucks with pop and tax. Outrageous. 

Collection

Like this a lot. Should get out; take more.
But narration is solipsistic and futile.

This swiped. Narrative is: where's Barry?

Motivation

Some little activity socially in media. Minimal response. Just had a Python thought... something completely different? Hardly. I'm tired.

Not going anywhere today except later to Bible study. Finishing up 2 Maccabees, which is a paraallel of the first. Did not know that. Got though about half of that before zoning out.

Friend at church gave me this to read. (Very long reading list.) I'd like to get into it today. We can talk about it hence. Got somewhat involved with academic issue orbiting the milieu. Sense they've got no respect. The old question: do you want to be friends or do you wish to compete?

Take it all in stride.

Little walk yesterday seeking above.

At Ease

This will be my last post for a while. In addition to being a food and nicotine addict, I am become an Internet one. Facebook. Twitter. It's got me hooked good; making comments, snarking, trying to prove I can swim with the sharks and run with the wolves. Read the news, the blogs, the commentariat; compelled to compose. I thought it good, the mental stimulation and activity, the challenge of wordsmithing and perfect grammar. It's become obsessive. I need to step away.

I need to address these addictions. I need to pray.
Sweet Jesus, it's all such a distraction. I need to tidy up.

I think I'll be back here before tweeting or shooting the breeze on Facebook. Updates. I mean to read my Bible and get right with The Lord. Stop wasting time. Get healthy. It's all a poor substitute for human companionship. The way it is and I've got to get over that. There'll be someone. If not, c'est la vie.

May

First post this month. 
Just some pictures from the yard.

Went to Bible study. Good to get out. 
Cooped up last few days.

Love the app. Could be better. 
Well, they're right there.